The Story SH characters would never be part of...

[Vaan-Knight]

I was thinking, many times I've complemented other ppl's posts in the "sh chars. would never say" threads, some of you have done the same, some jokes are so wicked cool, they inspire us to keep the insanity on one single post!

So now, THAT is the whole point of this game. I'm gonna start a story, the next poster will have to continue that story using whatever SH characters he/she wishes (we might also use cameos from other games and whatnot).

There's no limit to it; no rules other than keeping some coherence between posts, so it looks like an evergrowing and incredibly large post after a while.

No need to Quote the last post, since all of them should be connected. The individual posts can be as large or as small as you need them to be.

Well, here we go, let's see how far this gets:

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Harry Mason looked down to the destroyed asphalt road and wondered if he could leave the town by hiking down the hole...

[AlexY]

...but then he realized he lacked the tools to do so. He decided to search for some nearby.

Browsing through the map, he observes a curious store name which he didn't notice before; "Billy's Hill-Hike Store", down in the eastern part of Central Silent Hill.

With his trusty steel pipe, he bashed his way through demons' heads and arrived at yonder destination. There was a note on the door:

"Went to hike in Burkittsville. Be back in a week or so!
P.S. Mom, if you need the pickaxe again, just take the key from Ms. Gilly in Lion's, she's holding it on for me.
<3 Billy"

The door was locked.

Naturally, since Harry cannot bash through glass doors, he needed to find the key...

[Lolli]

So he headed back the way he came, checking his map for guidance. Glancing up as he trundled along he saw a figure in the distant fog.

Breaking into a run Harry sprinted forward until he was right behind the figure. He reached out a hand and grasped it's shoulder, resulting in the figure turning around to reveal a familiar face....

[Vaan-Knight]

...it was none other than the RE4 merchant, who stood in town after his little episode with Travis.

Merchant: I've got some good things on sale, stranger!

Harry: Oh, thank god... I thought you were an exhibitionist... the way you opened your coat out of the blue... Oh, is that a M16 rifle?

Harry armed himself with several firearms and a good army knife, along with a complete set of hiking gear.

Fearless, Harry psyched for his incoming adventure, which was gonna take him to the depths of the caverns bellow the destroyed roads of Silent Hill. Facing the huge crevice, he thought it would be a good idea to take with him a trusty sidekick.

Harry: Of course! all I have to do is ask Henry! He's by far the most gullible SH protagonist ever!

Later on, we see Harry knocking on Henry's apartment door...

[AlexY]

... and after a couple of knocks, the rattling of chains and unlocking could be heard.

The door opened to reveal Walter. In his boxers.

Harry: Oh hi Walt! How's it hanging?

Walt: Oh you know, a murder here, muder there. What brings you here?

Harry: Well, I actually need to talk to Henry for a bit. Can I see him?

Walt: Sure, come on right in.

Harry steps in, while Walt obsessively locks the door again.

Harry: You've redecorated, I see...

Walt: Yeah, most of these skins and heads are off eBay. You have no idea what kind of freaks hide there. Worse than me. That pink teddy wallpaper is Henry's idea, though.

Harry: Where is he anyway?

Walt: Oh yeah.

Walt enters the pantry, and shouts: HENRY, HARRY'S HERE TO SEE YA! YOU CAN COME ON DOWN!

After a bit of weird clanking sounds in the pantry, Henry comes out in a sado-mazo outfit.

Henry:.....

Walt: Yeah, I'll get his clothes. He likes this stuff so much, don't ya Henry. Don't ya? *spank*

Henry:..... *pleased look*

Harry: Oh this is going to be swell!

And after Henry put on some clothes, Walter opened up the door with straight access to the crevice and waved goodbye to Henry with their favourite dildo.

And so, the two heroes stood in front of the deep hole....

[Lolli]

...Staring into the pitch black. Unusure of what they were going to tie their rope onto the two glanced at one another.

Harry: There's nothing to tie the rope onto!

Henry:...Erm...

Harry: Wait I know, Henry jump down the hole will you?

Henry: But I might hurt myself.

Harry: Nah, this is Silent Hill, you can't hurt yourself jumping down holes, just look at James, he jumped down loads and survived without a scratch.

Henry: Well okay, if you're sure.

Harry: Sure go for it.

Henry stepped onto the edge of the hole, causing bits of debris to crumble into it. Slowly leaning over to get another peek down into oblivion Henry suddenly felt a sharp pain in his back as Harry's hands jabbed him forward, down into the hole.

Harry: *Eyes Closed* MARCO!!!!

Henry: POOOOOLOOooooooooo.....

[patient]

Expecting a thud, none came--however, Henry's screams echoed through the darkness below. Harry blinked and looked at Walter. Walter smiled with a shrug. Harry called, "Henry! Scream... what's with that scream?!"

"Um, I'm okay." He was impaled by a bed of spikes--turned into a shish kabob, to be precise. A monster down below came up to him holding a knife, fork, and having a napkin around its neck.

(I'm not TRYING to be mean to Henry. Just came out that way. ^^; )

[Lolli]

...Just as the monster was about to dig into Henry a familiar voice sounded in the shadows.

"Back off bitch he's mine!"

Henry used all of his strength to lift his head and look towards the voice. Pyramid Head emerged from the shadows dragging the great knife behind.

"So Henry, you're the monotonous one are you?"

Henry nodded in reply as Harry and Walter looked on in horror. Pyramid Head walked over and pulled Henry off the spikes, grasping him by his collar.

"You like Doggies?" Pyramid Head asked.

"Erm..Yes."

"Good, bend over."....

[Vio]

CUT!!!

Vio appears from a cloud of smoke and dust, causing some to cough, and Walter to have a mild allergic reaction.

Vio: Pyramid Head! I warned you time and time again not to violently rape people on this forum, it's not safe for work! There are kids on here for God's sake! And give me that knife, it could put someone's eye out!"

Vio grabs PH and drags him off.

Henry: What the hell?

Harry: That mod's an ass.

Walter: ...and just when it was getting good.

[mr. worncoat]

As Pyramid Head slinks away in defeat, Vio bandages up Henry while Walter and Harry settled on how to get down there safely. Seeing as Walter was already dead, he dropped onto the spikes, impaled without barely a yelp, and Harry jumped down after, safely landing on, then rolling off of Walter. Walter peeled himself off, dusted off, then joined Harry by Vio and Henry.

Vio: There we are, good as new.

Henry: I don't feel good as new..

Harry: Yeah, not to risk the banhammer, but he's still kind of bleeding. Heavily. As in, I don't think bandages really fixed any part of this situation. At all.

Vio gave Harry a long, bothered look and walked away.

Vio: Fine, you deal with it. I'll take myself somewhere where I'm appreciated.

Harry, Henry, and Walter look at each other, unsure whether to follow Vio or not, when a cough is heard from behind them. The first monster from before Pyramid Head, still with bib and utensils and looking very hungry, gave a little wave.

Monster: I hope you fellows don't mind, but I'm still hungry. If you'd step to the side, perhaps in a line or something, I can devour you all in a few minutes, no hassle.

Walter simply smiled, stepping back slowly, as Harry stepped in between Henry and the monster, weapon at the ready.

Harry: About that.. you're going to have to look elsewhere for food, you strangely well-spoken creature of the damned. Because that's not going to happen.

The monster snuffed, raising himself to his full height...