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Post by blacky on Apr 14, 2011 22:40:12 GMT
*At the church...*
Claudia: How did you get here? It was Vincent, wasn't it? He led you here. When will he cease his medd....?
*Claudia trips up on the chruch rug and falls flat on her face*
Heather: "Bad guy falls on face, classic element of physical comedy! Now comes the part where we throw our heads back and laugh! Ready?"
*Vincent and Douglas appears at Heather's side, grinning*
Vincent and Douglas: "READY!"
*Heather, Vincent and Douglas laughs like crazy at Claudia*
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Sindaiin
Nurse
Lakeside Amusement Park Curator
Posts: 206
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Post by Sindaiin on Apr 17, 2011 4:34:40 GMT
Mad Hatter: Ah, it seems we have guests today! (Lifts the Mouse's head from his plate) Mouse: I'm awake! I wouldn't be talkin' if I wasn't now would I!? Mad Hatter: Quite true. (Sets the mouse down) Alice: (Holds out hand) My name's Alice. I kill suits with a Wonderland-brand kitchen knife and blew up the local queen with a magical staff. This is Ches, he looks sinister, but he's really just a scardy cat. Cheshire Cat: And Alice here's mad. Alessa: (Shakes Alice's hand) I know all about you. I'm the mother of God and I punish cultists with contrapasso similar to Dante's Inferno. Alice: I think we'll get along quite nicely. Alessa: Me too. Hatter: So... how do you know about us? Magical powers perhaps? Alessa: ...Nope, a pop up book and a Disney movie.
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Post by dreggnog on Apr 17, 2011 10:36:33 GMT
Claudia picks up the god fetus, appearing ready to eat it, all the while keeping an eye on Heather.
Heather: "HOLY SHIT!! DON'T EAT THAT, IT'S A FETUS FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!"
The word FETUS flashes on the screen and Claudia and Vincent scream.
Claudia: "YOU SAID THE SECRET WORD!"
Heather: "Oh, you guys!"
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Sindaiin
Nurse
Lakeside Amusement Park Curator
Posts: 206
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Post by Sindaiin on Apr 18, 2011 5:40:02 GMT
Harry rises from his grave and runs to the chapel Roadrunner Loony Toons style. Harry: Does this mean we're rich now?
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Post by dreggnog on Apr 28, 2011 20:25:54 GMT
Blood pours out of the drain in the bathtub.
Heather: "Hey, it's a bloodbath! Get it!?"
Valtiel crawls down the wall, looks at Heather for a second, then slaps her.
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Post by blacky on Apr 29, 2011 15:10:00 GMT
Judge Holloway: "Heather Mason, you have been charged with illegal abortion, how to you plead?" Heather: "Not guilty!" Judge Holloway: "Okay we will hear from the prosecution" Lawyer Valtiel: "Miss Mason, is it true that you tried killing God with an drug like substance?" Heather: "It wasn't to kill it, just remove it from my body" Lawyer Valtiel: "And is it true that you tried to step on the foremenctioned being?" Heather: "I guess so" Lawyer Valtiel: you hear that ladies and gentlemen? This drug addicted woman tried to step on her own baby! So miss Mason what happened then?" Heather: "Well then Claudia ate it and gave birth to it" Lawyer Valtiel: "And is it true that you then attacked the baby? killing it dead?" Heather: "Well yes, otherwise it would of destroyed the world as we knew it" Lawyer Valtiel: "The accused has just admitted to killing an harmless baby! Under the influance of drugs, this woman smashed the brains out of her own baby daughter using an mace! I rest my case!" Judge Holloway: "Thank you Mr Valtiel. We will now hear from the Defence" Defence lawyer Eddie: "I would get up, but my ass is stuck in this bench" Heather: "This is so unfair!"
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Post by blacky on May 5, 2011 0:54:33 GMT
Vincent: "Besides, I always hated getting all hot and sweaty."
*Heather points at Vincent accusingly and shouts.......*
Heather: "VIRGIN!"
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Post by blacky on May 9, 2011 12:48:19 GMT
*Heather is in the woman's toilets at the beginning*Voice: "Hello" Heather: "Erm....Hello?" Voice: "How are you?" Heather: "Okay I guess..." Voice: "I am going to have to call you later, there is a idiot here in the toilet answering to my every word" Heather:
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Post by blacky on Jun 1, 2011 0:08:53 GMT
Heather: "On second thought, let's not go to Silent Hill. It is a silly place."
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Post by dreggnog on Jun 1, 2011 1:04:37 GMT
Heather: "On second thought, let's not go to Silent Hill. It is a silly place." Perfect.
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Post by Blackdog on Jun 6, 2011 23:12:58 GMT
?: (singing) "My lumps, my lumps, my lovely lady Bumps"
Heather: Excuse me...?
Vincent: Holy cr...!" *Runs and hides in shame*
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Post by Lolli on Jun 12, 2011 17:19:22 GMT
At the church, Vincent is holding mass.
Vincent: The two women dragged him to King Solomon, seeking guidance over whom had the right to take him.
Mary and Maria are fighting over James, each one tugging at an arm.
Mary: He's mine!
Maria: No he's mine!
Cut back to the church.
Vincent: And then King Solomon said, "I shall slice thy man in half and each of you shall have a piece." And thus, my sermon is concluded.
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Post by blacky on Jun 27, 2011 15:25:22 GMT
Douglas: "i've got good news and bad news"
Heather: "Just give it to me"
Douglas: "Good news is that Harry survived the attack at his home, the bad news is he has suffered massive brain damage and now can only say two words"
Harry: "huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio huh radio......"
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Post by Blackdog on Aug 24, 2011 13:16:10 GMT
Heather: Finally made it to the amusement park.
?: Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Heather: Aha Monster! .... DAD?!
Harry: Oh hi Heather.
Heather: Dad I thought you were dead?!
Harry: Oh erm about that. That was my body double. Dying is boring. I wanted to ride the merry-go-round instead.
Heather: I thought you died. How could you do that to me?
Harry: Shush, Daddy is going around again. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
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Post by blacky on Sept 4, 2011 3:12:34 GMT
*Pyramid Head is outside Douglas' apartment with a microphone*Pyramid Head: "You and I must make a pact, we must bring salvation back Where there is love, I'll be there I'll reach out my hand to you, I'll have faith in all you do Just call my name and I'll be there!" *Pause*Pyramid Head: "Where is he? I am singing my heart out here and he hasn't come to look out his window!" Nurse: "Isn't that him running out the backdoor?" Pyramid Head: "No Douglas no! Over here! I am over here! Your running the wrong way!" Nurse: "He isn't stopping" Pyramid Head: "Ah minge dribble!"
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